I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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