What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize