Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
