Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
