i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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