I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Randomize
