Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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