everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Randomize
