we have officially lost it.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
