God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
