Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
