Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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