Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
