whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Green mimosas i think yes
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
