You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
