i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
