Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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