If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
there's paper in my vomit.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
