I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
