do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
