i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
