then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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