This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize