ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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