i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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