its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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