margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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