i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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