i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
