i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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