i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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