I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
he fucked my hip out of place.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize