Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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