just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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