that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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