Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
