ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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