So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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