this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
