If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
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