How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
