I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I wish i was in the wii world.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
