i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize