I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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