Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
As shirtless as possible
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
