You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
