Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just cut my nipple shaving
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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