I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
