i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
