that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
