I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
did you just send me my own nude
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
