And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
