Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize